Charm. Presence. Personality. Strength. Confidence. Character. "Charismatic" is the way almost every person on the planet wants to come across as. Guys like George Clooney and women like Emma Stone just ooze it... Here's a way to be a little more like them.
1.) Nod your head whenever someone is talking to you. Politicians do it for a reason.
2.) Give compliments in a smooth and non-creepy ways. Going for personality---not looks---is usually a safer move.
"That Facebook status you posted about the Golden Globes was too funny. Seriously, your posts always make me laugh."
3.) When giving your opinion on something, always ask another person what they think about it once you're finished.
"This steak is delicious, literally cooked to perfection. Jake, what do you think of it?"
4.) When listening in a group conversation, don't be the person who is just anxiously awaiting their turn to talk about something. Being a good listening is an incredible quality, and you'll know when it's the right time to speak.
5.) Remember the details and give thanks to things people don't normally give thanks to.
"That bottle of wine you suggested a few weeks ago has become my new favorite. Thank you again for the suggestion, I could learn a thing or two from your vino knowledge."
6.) Don't cross your arms when you're talking to someone. Your body language says "closed off" and it's harder to connect with someone through conversation.
7.) Texting is such a big part of our culture now, so the language you use when speaking through technology is also very important. Try to avoid adding a simple "haha" at the end of sentences. It shows insecurity in whatever you just said. Instead, use a regular period, but change the specific language if you were going for a more light-hearted tone.
"I had such a good time at the beach with you today. Better weather hopefully next time haha"
"Cloudy weather at the beach didn't get in the way of a really good time today. That game you taught me was so much fun."
8.) Constantly be optimistic. Doom and gloom people almost never come off as charming or charismatic.
"13 hour shift today would have been terrible if I didn't enjoy the company of my co-workers so much. I feel so lucky I work with such great people."
9.) Apparence matters if having white teeth, a fresh haircut, and a well cut suit on makes you feel more confident. The more confident you are, the better your body language and demeanor will be.
10.) Nothing is more trustworthy and respectful than defending others when they're not there to defend themselves.
"I know Hannah can be a bit much sometimes, but she's really an outstanding person and so good at her job. I promise you'll warm up to her as you get to know her more."
11.) Try to drop a lot of the "I think" and "Maybe we should do..." from your vocabulary. Own what you're going to say and be confident about it, people gravitate towards decision makers who are decisive.
"Maybe we should go to that new Greek restaurant? I don't know how good it is but I'm down to try it if you are."
"I don't much about that new Greek restaurant, but it sounds delicious right now. Let's give that a shot and if it's bad, I can make it up to you with some frozen yogurt afterwards."
12.) Be comfortable with your weaknesses and insecurities. Own them.
"I'm so lucky my jump shot is terrible, pick-up games at the gym are much more my speed than the NBA."
13.) Ask a lot of smart questions. If you're in a meeting, you'll become the center of attention. If you're in a 1 on 1 conversation, you'll come off as thoughtful and kind, as people love talking about themselves.
14.) Invite people to things out of the blue. It let's them know you're thinking about them and that they're a priority in your life.
"I'm heading to that new bar you were telling me about tonight around 10pm. Let me know if you want to come and I'll have the Uber swing by to pick you up on the way. Would be great to catch up."
15.) Use a medium amount of hand gestures while talking. It conveys that you're passionate about whatever you're saying.
16.) Gift people things on occasion. This isn't trying to buy affection---no Prada handbag or 4k TV---but a nice and thoughtful thing that made you genuinely think of them goes a very long way. If your friend just got a new puppy, and you come across an awesome new dog toy, pick it up and give it to them the next time you see him or her.
17.) When delivering criticism, always include positive words and compliments to come off as more likable and charming.
"I'm really proud of your growth in this new position over the last year, you've worked really hard and I've noticed. I do, however, think we need to make your presentation skills a priority. I've been slightly unimpressed at the last few meetings and want you to focus more on preparation and delivery over the next month."
18.) Accept compliments graciously. Don't play them off or discount them, just play it cool.
19.) Learn to joke around a tease people. Don't be too brash or loud, but feel comfortable enough with the people you're close with to jokingly give them a hard time or be sarcastic about a situation.
20.) Visualize success. Many athletes do this before games but it's something that helps in all aspects of life. Whether you have a hot date or an important meeting, visualize yourself being charming and charismatic in those situations. It sincerely helps.